i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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