How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
Randomize
