I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
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