Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
