are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
