Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
