apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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