theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
