Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
I just want nice things and good sex
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
Randomize