Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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