let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
