so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
