she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
you told grandpa to call you daddy
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
