My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
