I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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