I just saw a hot homeless man
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize