its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
