barbara walters just said penis...
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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