she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
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