Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
