doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm not a horrible person, I just see what everyone chooses to politely ignore.. And occasionally say it aloud whilst deeply intoxicated.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
