the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
The penis is a tricky weapon to use. When using it as leverage you have to make it seem emotional. I'd rather use it as a club sometimes.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I have post one night stand depression
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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