he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
