I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
I DEMAND FORESKIN
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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