Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
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