It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
He? As in you personified your dick?
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
