she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Randomize
