i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
We both work at 8am and I have to shower but my roommate is passed out on our bathroom floor with the door locked. Merry Christmas.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Randomize
