Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
