How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
PANTIES FOUND
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