You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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