I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
It was a blind-side dick pic.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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