Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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