I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
