My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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