We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
