no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
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