i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Randomize
