If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
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