Did you just throw up mid-sentence?
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
No, I think it was the night I threw up in her front yard. You're thinking of the time I threw up in her backyard.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Randomize
