Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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