i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
