my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
she said she was so hungover this morning in a way that sounded like she was apologizing for thinking she was attracted to me last night...
Randomize
