You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I woke up to 30 angry texts and her Chihuahua in my room. Can you drop him off for me?
You were sitting at the bus stop holding hands with some Polish girl you just met, who was just as drunk as you were, and you kept trying to light your Kit Kat and smoke it.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
