I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
