I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
