I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It's official drugs can't kill me
you had me at cake vodka
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
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