ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Randomize
