I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
