I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
It's been so long that I've occasionally forgotten I own a vagina
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
