some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
its sad that I know 23 beers will fit into my purse
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
My dick has a subreddit
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
kind of bad when u call a cop an asshole for driving you home from the bar
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize
