Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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