I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
another moral hangover. fuck.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Just took a piss in some random bushes in a traffic jam and had to sprint back to the car. I'm a boss.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
wow bdsm is so cute
Randomize